15 February 2001

Riddle time: What’s the difference between Internet access and a gas-guzzling luxury car? Nothing, according to the new chairman of the Federal Communications Commission. In a story in today’s Wall Street Journal (you know things are bad when even the WSJ is more progressive than the current administration), FCC chair Michael Powell says that the digital divide is like “a Mercedes divide — I want one, I can’t afford one.” WELL! You nasty poor folk trying to reach your utility or phone company, you lazy-ass middle-class folk trying to stretch your budgets by doing price comparisons on purchases, you rotten juvenile delinquents who suck up education funds that could be used for private-school vouchers, aren’t you ashamed of yourselves now?

Dubya is God’s vengeance on us for not butting out of Bill Clinton’s sex life. Honestly.

15 February 2001