Things crawl up the Village Voice’s butt and die, and then this sort of thing happens. Thank God no NYC journalists have heard about this, or they’re be passing links to the article around amongst themselves and laughing.

Note to Dan Hubert, one of those nasty critters one occasionally finds sliming around a college newspaper accumulating resume fodder: No, pookums, spewing racist crap in print won’t keep you from getting elected to public office ’cause you’re a racist. It’ll keep you from getting elected to office ’cause you’ve provided reproducible, Google-locatable proof that you’re too goddamned stupid to operate an adult-sized mouth.

Okay, everybody who’s all shocked about the Russians chucking mystery gas into that theater? You have so not been paying attention.

Ron Lantz: A good man. Thank you, sir, from a grateful Eastern Seaboard, and a very happy retirement to you.

Here’s something on Gex X versus whining ex-hippies in the workplace. Not that I’m taking sides.

This thing with the Huskers — you have no idea how disorienting this is. You Seahawks fans and so forth, you Mets fans, you’re USED to it. Nebraska has never been out of the rankings in my natural life. I didn’t feel this bad when I figured out there was no Santa Claus. (Hell, I figured that red-and-white suit wasn’t an accident; Christmas is bowl-time, and I just assumed the big guy had tickets.)

Dear god — I was going about my day like a normal person, and then sll of a sudden I’m agreeing with Jesse Helms on something. I am so tramatized I don’t quite know what to do. Where am I? What’s happening? It all seems like a horrible dream…

Which is better in this CNN story — the quote about the children, or the illustration? In any case, someone’s having way too much fun with this story.

Jim Caple makes me weep with joy.

From my friend Jason, this lovely forward from Slate, which basically sums up the whole shootin’ match (I fit at least two of these descriptions; do I hear three, three?):

Jack Shafer, who says he never considered journalism school, writes: “I fear that [Columbia U. president Lee Bollinger’s] New Improved Columbia Graduate School of Journalism will be an overly academic program, and that other schools, ever impressed by the Ivys, might imitate it. I fear the day that the J-school credential assumes such an aura that it becomes a prerequisite for a newspaper job, the way the B.A. credential has. Journalism depends on uncredentialed losers, outsiders, dilettantes, frustrated lawyers, unabashed alcoholics — and, yes, creative psychopaths — to keep its blood red.”