Oh NO — I thought this was all settled. Elmer’s Flying Espresso is a wonderful espresso bar and it really isn’t impeding a thing. (If she’s impeding traffic, what about those godawful non-information info kiosks? Those seem much worse to me.) I certainly signed the petition while I was out there last. I hope things are resolved. And you may be sure that I’ll be blowing off the two interlopers mentioned.

Yes, it’s about that time again — everyone’s on the move. Dave Barry’s taking a well-deserved break for who-knows-how-long. At Newsday, Ed Lowe’s bailing. And Dan Gillmor, one of the most fascinating guys on the tech beat, has a better idea. Where does it end? Where does it end? (And do any of them have, like, really excellent apartments they’d be willing to sublet while they go off to find themselves?)

Some Down East mommy is demanding that Catcher in the Rye be banned as reading material for her child’s entire freshman class. That’s not so surprising — alas, Salinger is often targeted for this sort of thing — but this particular inbreed is claiming she’s never even heard of the book. Shouldn’t this idiot here have been required to pay attention during her own high-school classes before she got the idea she should fuck up someone else’s?

Attention New York Times factchecking department! Though today’s hangover-cure article was most enjoyable, I must note that you left out a crucial element: Tabasco. The tomato-juice cure only works with a whole lot of tabasco mixed in. Endorphin release probably has something to do with it, but you’re going to have to trust me on this. And if maybe you’ve got a lemon handy, a dose of juice wouldn’t hurt.

Andrew Kantor’s having more fun with the Mac-vs.-a-life crowd. Someone should tell them that he does this to entertain himself (and us, lord, and us), but you have to assume they enjoy it too I suppose.

My mother and I have jointly settled on the best description of the day just ended: A waste of 24 hours’ worth of clock battery. Feel free to spread the meme.